December 2011
Why being a girl isn't working out for me:
Body: Oh, guess what time of the month it is!
Me: Please, god, no--
Ovaries: ALL SYSTEMS GOOOOOOOO!!!
Brain: I quit. i quit. kittens and cupcakes and no one loves me. oh my god salty snacks i am furious
Me: Please, guys, calm down--
Face: TIME TO RUIN EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVER LIKED ABOUT ME. I'M GROWING MOUNTAINS, BITCHES.
Brain: And now I'm ugly! shbdksdnksbn
Torso: Time to practice labor. cramp this bitch up. GO GO GO GO GO GO
Me: STOP IT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!
Stomach: lol clothes cant fit you anymore. you are bloated. you are now a balloooooooon!
Me: I hate you all
Brain: I KNOW EVERYONE HATES ME I AM SO DEPRESSED. we need to procreate.
Face: Lol, i'm not done yet.
Uterus: what did i ever do to deserve this?
Brain: you just wait uterus. they're going to make you hold a baby for like 9 months straight.
Uterus: You mother fuckers.
Torso: CONTRACT!
Me: I quit being female, I am now a llama.
Brain: Me gusta.
That awkward moment when you realize that Kim...
Please read: Due to a high amount of unused blogs...
Operator: 911, please hold.
Me: Stop murdering me for a sec; we're on hold.
Murderer: ok
Girls with the same face in every picture.
thatfunnyblog:
Guys do it too…
Fish do it too…
During night time in my house: →
totally-relatable:
what would happen if i didnt have a blanket…
when i walk by the hall…
when i got to the livingroom…
when i go to the kitchen …
when i walk by stuffed animals …
thats why i never get out of bed during night.
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